Daddy's Home!!

So Coach came home on September 11th!!!  It is so great to have him home.  I think that Big T is actually enjoying him being home more than I am.  He loves having a Daddy!!!!!!
I do love having a convenient and cheap babysitter while I am refereeing volleyball and out riding horses.
 I didn't just put him to work though, we have been enjoying the outdoors, especially since the weather is still so nice. :-)

 So I'm just going to post a ton of photos, they speak better than I can.
( I really should do collages, but I haven't made templates and this is easier and quicker for me right now...so you'll have to suffer through scrolling down :-) ....sorry )

Palisade Falls:

Campfire: S'mores (& burning paper you would normally shred if you had a paper shredder)

Skipped the roasting mallow part and just hung out with all the supplies

Rat Lake:

 Uhh...we're Montanans why wouldn't we shoot a pistol into the lake??

My wimpy kid who fell off his log into the mud, and hit his face, but all he wanted was the mud off his hands!!

Coach AND I each caught a frog :-)

 

The Time Is Here

Coach will be arriving on Saturday!!!

Well I made it! ...I lasted a whole year without my hubby.  I of course had some help from my amazing family!!  A huge shout out to my Parents.  They let me come stay with them for months at a time.

While I don't wish the separation of a spouse on anybody, I did learn and grow as an individual, where as I'm pretty sure I might not have in certain areas if he hadn't left.  I can look back now and see where I used Coach as a crutch.
When Coach was gone I started out the first couple of months okay, I was feeling fairly normal and happy.  After those couple of months I started the emotional roller coaster that didn't have very many highs, mostly mediocre to low, then to some real low, lows.  I have to give shouts to those that were there during my low, lows and kept a watchful eye on me..:-), you guys ROCK!!

I at first faced my problems with the attitude "I need to find out who I am."  That was sort-of helping, but I was still not getting much air, and didn't feel any happier about life.

Yeah, I was the a little overwhelmed with being the sole parent to Big T, who was not always an easy child to be a parent to period. But I had other feelings that didn't get dealt with even before Coach left that added to the pressure of single parenting.

I finally hit a rock bottom and realized I have got to get things together for my son and my husband and for our future.

 I was able to attend Education Week at BYU-I which taught me a ton and enlightened me as well. With the things I was taught there and diving more into the scriptures I was more open to the Spirit and I believe that when we have that Spirit and we are willing to be guided and taught, we will be. I was being taught when I came across this talk by Joesph B. Wirthlin Lessons Learned in the Journey of Life.
while all of this is a good talk the very last bit of it was what hit me and spoke to me the most.  It read as follows:
"George Bernard Shaw said: “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” Don’t worry about searching for who you are; focus your energies on creating the kind of person you want to be! You will discover that as you pursue that journey you will not only find yourself, but chances are you will be pleasantly surprised and proud of the person you find along the way."

I was trying to "Find Myself" and it wasn't working, so I decided It was time to "Create Myself."  And so I began that journey.
I set goals, made a list of things I wanted to try, do, and see; so far I've learned a ton.  My dad taught me how to work with wood and we built a set of dressers.  They look pretty amazing!!!  I also decided that I want to dabble with painting...on ceramic :-), So I painted Big T a piggy bank.  I also finally decided it was time to learn how to sew, even if its just the basics.  I will never be a great seamstress, ever, but I did sew a bag and I could probably do small things.
I also decided it was time to stop reading about others lives ( and getting jealous) and start living my own.  Don't get me wrong, I still read others blogs and look at photos on facebook, but my attitude toward it has changed, and I don't do it nearly as often.
while I was "creating" myself, I did "find" something that I had always loved, but somehow, and somewhere down the road didn't give it the attention it deserved, and that would be my love of Horses.  I know I have mentioned this before, but when I am on the back of a horse, I'm Home!!
I love the sound of leather squeaking under you and the sound of the horse as it is breathing.  I love the way you can really just move with the horse whether it is walking, cantering, or on a dead run after some calf!!  I love to run!! Plus my favorite smell in the world has always been a sweaty horse.
My dad taught me how to ride when I was just a tiny tyke..I even remember running in the field behind our house in Star Valley when I was only 5 ( all by myself might I add!)  I finally brought that love and my knowledge home with me to Bozeman, and I'm going to keep it with me always and never let it go again. I'm sorry I get so passionate about this topic...I just ramble on.

I know that I am definitely not done creating myself, but I have finally started and I have confidence in who I am so far.  I am not super mom, I suck at blogging.  There are some out there that are real pros with words.  I don't have the 3 kids that I wish I'd have by now, and I'm not even the best person out there on the back of a horse.  But, I'm healthy, I do have one amazing boy, and of course Big T ;-).  No.. I have a great Coach who has been willing to put up with the "before" me and still loved me!!

It sucked being away from my husband for all that time, but I'm grateful that I was able to really grow from the experience and really find happiness with who I am as an individual.  I'm so excited to take what I've learned and now use it to strengthen our relationships as a family and as a couple.


 

Big T's Bed

I have been cleaning up Big T's room and decided he needed more play room and so I took out the Papason Chair. (ps I have no idea how to spell that).
Coah will be so happy because for some weird reason he hates that chair.  Anywho, I had it taken apart and just sitting in the living room, not sure where to put it, or if I should finally just store it away for awhile (until we get a little bigger of a home).
Big T has fallen in love with the "new design"
 This is where he ends up when I tel him it is time to go to bed!!

 He is so used to being in front of the camera that he now poses :-)

My Type a Hike!!

I like to go hiking, I do, but I LOVE LOVE to be horseback!!!  When I am on the back of a horse, I'm home, whether it is on a trail ride or working cattle or just plain ol' riding.  I know exactly who I am at those moments and I actually have confidence in myself and a sense of peace.  I grew up on a horse and I'll die on a horse.  Big T is already developing that desire as well, I can't get him off once he is on.

Yesterday Dad and I went up the main Pahsimeroi draw.  It was such a beautiful hike ride!  With some challenges and obstacles.

 Big T had to stay home, but we gave him a short ride before.

Pops on Garth

 This shell rock looked like wood to me.

 Spartacus always has to be behind the lead, if he isn't exploring.

Looking back down the draw

 Elena and Garth

I think that high mountain meadows are gorgeous, a hidden oasis.

I also saw my Moose, it was a young bull ( since you can't tell)

 Can you tell where the water runs?

Stopped for lunch then headed back down.

Our Obstacles:

On the way up Pops and saddle were on the side of Garth to clear this.  On the way back down he decided to get off, and the saddle horn just barely cleared.

An easier one:

When we got home I took Big T on a short horse ride.

Pine Idaho

My parents, my little sister and her husband, myself, and my brother  met up with my pop's older bro and his daughter (my cousin) and her family to go camping.  It was nice to get to meet Diana's husband and children.  I haven't seen them since my Grandma Johnson's funeral in 2002.  So it's been awhile. My pop's bro is 10 years older than my pop, and Diana is his youngest daughter, and she is older than my oldest sister.

Big T and I shared a tent, for the first time!!  He didn't go to sleep until 2/3 hours after we went to bed..ughh.  I was so tired that morning.  He would run around inside the tent and he would crawl back and forth over me and say "1, 2, 3!!!" and then jump on the bed. Or he would say that and at the "3" he would kick the side of the tent.  I was tired and wanted him to sleep, but I still couldn't help from giggling at his excitiement!!

We camped on the South fork of the Boise River , and right where we were at there is a hot, HOT, springs that runs into the river.  I didn't realize how hot it was and stepped into it, and flew right out :-),
But people have made pools in the river so the water is perfect to sit and relax in!!

I also went floating down the river with 2 of Diana's kids and her husband, it too was enjoying. Mostly because Cotley and her Hubby got ate and spit out by a tree sticking over the water.  they were both on tubes and put their feet up to stop from getting hit in the face and then the water flipped them upside down!!  It was awesome because it looked like two synchronized swimmers!!
We didn't make it that far before we had to get out and hike through the woods to the road.  There was so much debris. 

Well, here are some photos from this weekend. I really didn't take a whole lot, totally dropped the ball.

Big T and Rylan fighting (they never stopped), and poor Wyatt who was sick the whole time.

Jason and Rylan ...aww how sweet!

Big T sitting on the pot :-)

Big T with his Auntie

 Big T needed a bath...

My Pop and His Brother

Pops and Marme

The Whole Camping Gang (minus Rylan..he fell asleep)